“Second Chances”

A JAG Fan-Fic

By Sheri Mitchell

sheri@mountainport.ca

http://mountainport.ca/JAG/

 

Rated: R

 

            Taking his eyes briefly from the road, Cdr. Harmon Rabb glanced at the woman stretched languidly in the passenger seat of his car.  He had only been dating her for a month, but what a month!  They hadn’t even slept together yet, but he already knew that when the time was right, it was going to be one of the most incredible experiences of his life.

            They had just spent a thoroughly enjoyable day together exploring the hiking trails in Rock Creek Park.  The fresh air, exercise and her unbridled joy at the colorful flitting birds and small furry creatures skittering ahead of them had made this day one of the best he’d had in a long time.

            Her head resting against the back of the seat, she beamed him another of those bright smiles he’d seen so often lately.  He liked to see her smile.  It reminded him that there was more to life than courtrooms, investigations and military discipline.  She was good for him that way, adding a balance to his life he hadn’t even known was missing.

            He returned her smile with one of his own.  “You look so contented.”

            “I am,” she admitted, stretching her lithe form in a way that had him taking his eyes off the road a whole lot longer than he should have.  “It’s all that fresh air.  It makes me sleepy.  I guess I’m not used to it, stuck in a stuffy office all day.”

            “I know the feeling,” he admitted.

            When he signed on with the navy, he certainly hadn’t planned on piloting a desk or navigating a complex legal brief, but fate hadn’t given him a lot of choice, so he rolled with the punches and managed to land on his feet.  At least fate had proved it wasn’t entirely cruel and had finally seen fit to put him with a woman who made him feel like he was soaring at angels-30 even when he was behind a desk.

            Mac had been bugging him for ages to quit being a hermit and remember that he was a healthy single male.  She’d been subtle about it at first, but became increasingly more blunt when he refused to get the hint.  He’d finally taken her advice and ever since, he had been wishing he’d done it ages ago.

            Of course, neither of them counted on him ending up with the woman who occupied his passenger seat.  That part was a bit of a surprise, but like most things that were truly meant to be, it just sort of happened one day and now it felt like the most natural thing in world.

            “Thanks for a wonderful day, Harm.” 

            They were approaching an intersection and when the light turned yellow, he brought the car smoothly to a stop and used the break from driving to turn more fully toward her.  “Thank you,” he countered.  “I had a great time too.”

            “Maybe the memory of it will keep us from going nuts in the office all week,” she said with a smile.

            He lifted a hand and gently cupped her cheek, then let his hand slide to the back of her neck, pulling her toward him for a quick but satisfying kiss.  “Come on, Mac, it’s not that bad.  Besides, if it really gets you down, we can always slip out to one of the local parks for a quickie on our lunch hour.”

            He fired her a grin to let her know he was kidding, trying for a play on words, but her next comment floored him.

            “Green light.”

            He stared at her.  What the...?  Was she suggesting....?”

            “Harm, the light’s green.”  She gestured out the windshield.

            Still confused, he followed her wave and realized she was referring to the traffic signal in front of them.  It had turned green and the traffic was beginning to flow around them.  A soft honk from behind goaded him into action.  Still off balance, he turned forward in his seat and put the car in gear.  Beside him, Mac was laughing.  She’d done that on purpose!

            He was about to give her hell for it but a blur of motion on the right caught the corner of his eye.  His aviator reflexes kicked in before he was even aware of it and he hit the brakes, narrowly avoiding the big pickup truck that whipped through the red light.

            The small car in the oncoming lane wasn’t so lucky.  Harm heard the loud crash and the gut wrenching scream of twisting metal, but the pickup was moving so fast, the actual impact was nothing but a blur.

            Both he and Mac responded instinctively.  He slammed his car out of gear and flicked off the engine before leaping out.  Mac was a step ahead of him but he closed the distance with a single long stride and they both arrived at the mangled vehicles the same time.  Mac went straight to the driver’s door of the truck, so Harm headed for the car.

            The truck had broadsided the smaller vehicle, impacting squarely on the driver’s door.  Clamping down on the rising dread inside him, he tried to see in through the spider’s web of broken glass that had once been the windshield.  All he could see was a glimpse of red clothing.  He assessed things instantly and realized he wasn’t going to have much better luck from the passenger side.  The impact had shoved the car through the intersection, sandwiching it against the light standard on the far corner.  Getting to the driver was going to take one hell of a lot of work.

            He rounded the car anyway, hoping to at least get a look inside and see if the emergency crews were going to be performing a rescue...or a body recovery.  The light pole had caved in the passenger door, but the impact was a little farther forward.  He might be able to see in from the side window of the back seat.  Ducking around the pole, he stepped carefully over debris until he could reach the window.

            The moment he got there, his stomach ground into a boil mass of nausea.  There was a body slumped in the back seat – a very small body.  But even as Harm struggled to hang onto his lunch, the small form moved slightly.  Harm took all of one second to assess the damage to the  window then stuck his hand through a small hole in the glass and yanked outward, pulling away the damaged but nearly intact safety glass.  He felt a sharp edge bite into the palm of his left hand but ignored it.

            The window was partially covered by the pole, but he managed to clear an opening large enough to reach one arm through.  He groped for the child and finally found a small denim clad leg.  He gave it a slight shake.  “Hey there, you okay?”

            He had to take his arm back out of the hole in order to see in.  When he peered through the small opening, his heart soared as a small round face appeared from beneath a mop of dark hair.  The child very slowly lifted his head and Harm realized it was a boy.  He hadn’t even known that until now.

            Two huge blue eyes stared at him, round and wide with fear.  Harm gave the kid the biggest smile he could muster.  “Take it easy and don’t move around too much.  Help is coming.”

            Despite his warning, the kid slowly sat up.  Harm started to tell him again to keep still but although he moved slowly and stiffly, it didn’t appear the boy was seriously hurt.  Thank God for safety belts and booster seats.

            “What happened?” came a tiny voice.

            “You were in an accident,” Harm said gently, “but you’re going to be okay.”

            “Where...where’s my mom?  Is Mom okay?”

            Harm’s gut seized all over again.  “She’s still up front.  Someone’s coming to help.  It will be all right.”

            The boy immediately released his seatbelt and made a move toward the seatback in front of him.

            “No!”  Harm reached through the window far enough to catch the kid’s arm and restrain him.  “Stay in your seat.”

            “But Mommy...”

            “Someone’s going to help her,” he said again.  “Just take it easy.”

            There was no way Harm wanted the kid crawling into the front seat and getting a look at his mother.  There had been no signs of movement, no sounds of life from the front of the car.

            “What’s your name?” he asked, hoping to distract the boy.

            “Aaron,” came the tiny reply.

            “Hi, Aaron.  I’m Harm.  Just sit tight, okay.  Someone’s going to get you out of there real soon.”

            “Okay, but...make them hurry.  I’m scared.”

            Now that the kid was sitting up, Harm could touch him without reaching in so far he couldn’t see what he was doing.  He reached through the window again and caught the boy’s hand.  The sirens were growing louder.  The emergency crews would be there in seconds and then Harm could make good on his promise.

            He sensed a movement beside him and glanced over as Mac squatted down beside him.  She glanced into the car then fired him a wide-eyed look.  He gave her a warning look in return, silently urging her to follow his lead.  “Aaron, this is my friend Mac.”

            Mac, bless her, caught on instantly, giving the kid a bright smile as though nothing was wrong.  “Hi there, Aaron.”

            “Hi.”

            “You’re kind of in a fix at the moment, aren’t you?”  She went on quickly before he could answer.  “Don’t worry, though, we’ll have you out of there in no time.”

            Aaron nodded, but his grip on Harm’s hand tightened.  “And my mom too?”

            Harm and Mac exchanged another look but when she turned back to the boy, all trace of concern slipped from her expression.  “And your mom too.”

            A few seconds later, a swarm of emergency personnel descended on the vehicle.  Harm gave the boy’s hand a squeeze then moved back out of the way to let the crews do their job.  As they moved to the curb, he glanced at Mac.  “How’s the driver?”

            “Hardly a scratch on him, but he’s going to have one hell of a hangover tomorrow,” she replied, her voice laced with utter disgust.

            Harm had to suppress the urge to find the guy and make sure he hurt from more than a simple hangover.

~~~~~~~~

            Nearly ten minutes later, one of the firefighters came over to them.  Before the man could even open his mouth, Harm asked the question foremost on his mind.  “How’s the mother?”

            “Alive,” the man replied, “but that’s about all I can say for her at the moment.  Is your name Harm?”

            “Yes,” he replied, confused.

            “The kid is asking for you.  We’re going to need to use a saw and the jaws of life to get him out and he’s pretty scared.  I know it’s a lot to ask, but would you mind sitting with him while we do the extrication?  We’ll cover you both with a blanket to protect against sparks and debris.”

            “I know the drill,” Harm replied quickly, “and I’d be happy to stay with him if it will help.”

            As he started away behind the firefighter, he felt Mac’s hand grip his arm and turned back briefly.  She had a smile on her face that said she thought he was doing something wonderful.  He wasn’t doing anything more than anyone else would do, but he covered her hand with his and gave it a quick squeeze before heading back over to the car.

            As he approached the vehicle, he could see several people on the far side, diligently working to free Aaron’s mother from the wreckage.  Two men gently eased a limp form from the car and slid her onto a spine board.  Harm got only an impression of dark blond hair before she was surrounded by a flurry of EMTs.

            Returning to his earlier post at the car’s back window, he brushed away enough glass and debris so he could kneel down and peer inside.  Aaron’s tiny hand shot out and Harm reached for it quickly.  “Hey there, champ, I heard they’re going to use a giant can opener to open up the car and get you out.  That sounds exciting.  Mind if I stay here and watch?”

            Aaron shook his head.  “I don’t mind, but it’s not exciting, it’s scary.”

            “There’s nothing to be afraid of,” Harm said gently.  “Do you think I’d want to come this close if there was?”

            The slightly bent logic worked on Aaron’s young mind.  “No.”

            “Then trust me when I say it’s safe, but it is going to be loud, at least for part of the time.”

            Harm was right about that.  Once the firefighters had draped a large yellow blanket over him and another over Aaron, the cutting began.  At the first roar of the saw, Aaron’s hand tightened on Harm’s in a grip that was almost painful.  Harm squeezed back, wishing he could reassure the boy with more than touch, but the noise made talking impossible.

            As soon as the saw finished, Harm started asking Aaron questions to take his mind off what was going on around them.  He asked about school, sports, friends, anything he could think of.  He started to run out of ideas long before the extrication was complete.  Searching his mind, he latched onto a thought.

            “Hey, Aaron, did I tell you I’m in the navy?”

            The kid shook his head, his eyes lighting with a gleam of curiosity.

            “I am, and I have an idea.  We’ll have to check with your parents to make sure it’s okay, but if they say it is, how would you like a tour of a real navy ship?”

            To Harm’s surprise, Aaron’s chin dropped to his chest.  “I only have one parent.  There’s just me and my mom.  My dad’s gone.”

            Harm ached to ask what ‘gone’ meant but he didn’t want to stir up any unpleasant memories.  Whatever the reason, Aaron’s father obviously wasn’t a part of his life and Harm knew all too well what that felt like.  “Then we’ll have to ask your mom, just as soon as she’s done with the doctors.”

            Harm prayed she would be in good enough shape to hear and respond to a question, but he had to give the boy some hope, at least until they knew more.

            “Where is she?” Aaron asked quietly.

            “She’s gone to the hospital,” Harm replied just as an ambulance screamed off into the gathering twilight.  “You get to ride in an ambulance too.  Won’t that be a lot of fun?”

            Aaron shook his head.  “No it won’t.”

            “Sure it will,” Harm insisted.  “I’ve been in an ambulance and it’s lots of fun.”

            Aaron looked unconvinced.  “When you were a kid?”

            “Uh-huh.  I wasn’t much bigger than you.  How old are you?”

            “I’m seven, but I’ll be eight in four months.”  Aaron’s chest puffed out slightly and Harm knew instantly this was yet another kid who couldn’t wait to grow up.

            “Then I was even younger than you.  I fell out of a tree when I was six.  My mom thought I split my head open but all I got was a few stitches.  I did get to ride in an ambulance, though.”  Harm could still vividly recall the ride, but he didn’t tell Aaron that the most memorable part of the whole experience was how much the needle stung when they froze his scalp so they could suture it up.

            A sudden loud screech of rending metal ripped through the confines of the car.  Aaron jumped and grabbed Harm’s hand with both of his, terror adding enormous strength to the small hands.  Harm gripped a little tighter too.  “It’s okay,” he shouted over the noise.  “They’re just taking the roof off the car.  You’ll be out of there in a few seconds!”

            True to his word, a moment later, someone took the protective blankets away, revealing the roof of the car peeled back like the lid of a giant can.  The instant Aaron saw the sky, he leapt to his feet on the seat and launched himself at Harm.  Despite the shock, Harm managed to catch him, holding him tight as small arms locked around his neck.  He knew Aaron shouldn’t be moving around so much, but nothing short of a crowbar was going to pry the kid loose.

            Arms wrapped around the trembling child, Harm turned from the car.  Mac was instantly at his side, stroking Aaron’s back with one hand while the other one rested gently on Harm’s.

            “I think he’s okay,” Harm told her, “just scared.”

            She nodded but escorted them to the EMTs waiting near the back of the second ambulance.  Harm tried to hand Aaron over to one of the medics, but the boy’s stranglehold tightened even further.

            “No!” he cried.  “Don’t let go!”

            Harm shot a helpless look at Mac and then at the EMT.  The medic nodded instantly.  “Why don’t you climb in and have a seat.  I can look him over on your lap, if he’ll let me.”

            Climbing into the ambulance, Harm sat down on the hard bench, turning Aaron to sit in his lap.  Aaron allowed himself to be turned around, but instantly switched his grip back to Harm’s hand.  “Don’t let him touch me!  I want Mommy!”

            Harm folded his arms a little tighter around Aaron’s small thin frame.  “It’s okay.  Everything will be all right.  He just wants to look at you and make sure you’re not hurt, then we’ll take that ride we talked about.”

            Aaron shook his head violently.  “He’s gonna poke me!”

            Harm heaved a sigh, doubly thankful he hadn’t told Aaron about the needle he got as a kid.  He glanced at the EMT.  “Does he need any injections or an IV?”

            “I doubt it,” the medic replied.  Then a small grin slid onto his round face.  “He looks pretty healthy to me.”

            Harm grinned down at Aaron.  “There, you see?  No pokes, I promise.  He just wants to check you over.  Do you hurt anywhere?”

            Aaron shook his head, his face still buried against Harm’s chest.  With Harm’s help, the medic managed to give Aaron a cursory going over.  “He seems okay, but he will need to go to the hospital.”

            “No!” Aaron wailed.

            Harm fired a pleading glance at Mac.  He didn’t have a clue how to deal with a terrified child.  Mac stepped up into the ambulance and sat down beside them.  She rubbed Aaron’s back with a slow, gentle hand.  “It’s okay, Aaron.  Everyone here is trying to help you.  Just go with the ambulance driver and he’ll—”

            “No!  I don’t want to go alone!”  His head shot up and a huge pair of blue eyes locked onto Harm like a missile guidance system.  “Come with me.”

            Harm caught Mac’s eye over the top of Aaron’s head.  “Would you mind?  I know this isn’t exactly what we had planned for tonight.”

            She gave him another one of those smiles.  “Of course I don’t mind.  I’ll follow in your car.”

            He heaved another sigh.  “Thanks, Mac.  The keys are in it.”

~~~~~~

 

            Mac followed the ambulance to the hospital, hurrying inside as soon as she found a parking spot.  Harm was just coming out of a treatment room, his expression grim.  She crossed to him, noting how quickly he reached for her hand.

            “How’s the boy?” she asked.

            “Still scared.  I finally convinced him to let the doctor examine him, but I had to promise I’d be here when they were done.  Mac, I’m sorry.  I don’t know what to do.  He feels like I’m all he’s got right now.”

            She wrapped his hand in both of hers.  “It’s all right, I understand, but where’s his father?”

            His expression darkened even further as he shook his head.  “I don’t know if he’s dead or if they’re divorced.  Aaron just said he was gone.”

            Mac’s heart sank.  “And the mother didn’t look like she was in very good shape.”

            “I know.  Let’s see what we can find out about her.  I’d like to have some good news for Aaron when they’re done with him.”

            Mac followed him to the information desk.  The nurse looked up as they approached.  “Can I help you?”

            “I hope so,” Harm replied.  “I was wondering if there’s any news on the mother of the little boy I brought in?  I don’t know her name.”

            She checked her records.  “Jennifer Loring.  I’m sorry, I don’t have any information on her yet but if you—”

            “Wait a minute,” Harm said suddenly.  “Did you say her name is Jennifer Loring?  Is she from Baltimore?”

            The young woman checked her records again.  “That’s what her identification said.”

            Mac saw the look of shock on Harm’s face when he turned to her.  “I think I know her.”

            “What?  From where?” she asked, shocked herself.

            Still stunned, Harm moved slowly away from the counter.  Mac followed, slipping an arm around his waist.  In a move that seemed completely unconscious, he dropped one arm across her shoulders.  “We...dated for a while.  It was back before my accident.  We were getting pretty serious, or at least I thought so, but she...couldn’t handle me being away so much.  It was already starting to fall apart when I had the ramp strike.”

            There was a wistful sadness in his voice and Mac heard what he wasn’t saying.  “She used the accident as an excuse to leave you.”

            He shrugged.  “After the accident, she didn’t need an excuse.  I was a mess.”

            “Still, losing your girlfriend at the same time you were recovering from something like that couldn’t have made it any easier.”  She couldn’t quite keep the note of disgust from her voice.

            “I don’t know,” he replied, “maybe it did.  I sort of went to ground for a while to lick my wounds.  I didn’t feel like talking to anybody and not having a relationship to worry about was probably for the best.  We tried to get back together after I got myself squared away and transferred to JAG, but by then, we’d both changed too much.  It only lasted a couple of months.”

            It didn’t surprise Mac at all that Harm retreated within himself after his accident.  She’d seem him do the same thing with far less provocation.  He tended to back away from any emotionally intense situation, which is why it had come as such a surprise when, out of the blue, he’d asked her out a month ago.  After everything that had passed between them over the years, she’d almost thought it was some kind of joke, but he managed to convince her he was serious.  Once he had, it took her all of ten seconds to say yes and they hadn’t looked back since.

            She also knew Harm well enough to know this whole thing had to be hitting him pretty hard.  Not only would Aaron be pushing Harm’s very sensitive fatherless boy buttons, but now he also had to deal with the memories of another painful time in his life.  She dearly wished there was something more she could do to help him, but in so many ways, she still felt like they were nothing more than friends.  Their relationship was still so new, so fragile.

            Her thoughts were interrupted by the approach of a very weary looking doctor.  “I understand you were asking about Jennifer Loring.  Are you family?”

            “No,” Harm admitted.  “We witnessed the accident and I sort of helped out her son, but I didn’t find out who she was until just now.  It turns out she’s...an old friend of mine.”

            The doctor nodded.  “I see.  Well, I wish I had better news for you, but Ms. Loring isn’t doing very well.  Can you tell us how to contact her family?”

            Harm winced at the news.  “Her parents used to live in Greensboro, but that was years ago.  I’ll give you their names but if you don’t have any luck finding them, let me know.  I’m with the Navy JAG corps and if you can’t find them, we can.”

            Mac waited while they went to the counter and the doctor took down some information.  They talked for a moment and when Harm came back, he looked even more shaken.  He shot an involuntary glance at the treatment room where Aaron was waiting.  “They don’t think she’s going to make it.  They’re hoping she’ll hang on until some of the family can get here to be with him when they tell him.”

            Mac’s heart gave a painful squeeze.  “The poor kid.”

            Harm nodded but Mac could see the faraway look in his eyes.  “You know how he’s going to feel, don’t you?”

            “No,” he said roughly, “I don’t.  When they came to tell us about my dad, I at least had my mom there for me.”

~~~~~~

            The hospital was able to locate Jennifer Loring’s parents.  They still lived in Greensboro and when they were informed about the accident, they said they would be leaving immediately, but it was a long drive.  Mac accompanied Harm when he went back into the treatment room to see Aaron.  The moment they stepped into the room, the boy leapt off the examining table and launched himself at Harm.  “You were gone so long!  I thought you weren’t coming back!”

            In one smooth motion, Harm caught him and lifted him back onto the table.  “I’m sorry I took so long, but I promised you I’d come back and I always keep my promises.”

            “I want to see my mom,” Aaron declared.

            “Not right now, sport.  The doctors are still checking her out.”

            “How long will it be till I can see her?”

            Harm shot Mac a glance, but the look in his eyes said he knew she didn’t have any answers either.  He turned back to Aaron.  “It shouldn’t be too long now.”

            “Is she going to be okay?” Aaron asked.  “The car sure was smashed up.”

            “Yeah, it was,” Harm replied sadly, avoiding an answer to the boy’s question.

            Mac stepped forward to bail him out.  “Are you hungry?”

            “Sort of,” Aaron admitted.  “Mostly I’m thirsty.”

            Harm and Mac received permission to take Aaron down to the cafeteria.  They bought him a sandwich, a carton of milk and a bowl of green Jell-o.  Aaron surprised her by voluntarily letting go of Harm’s hand and carrying his milk to the table.  She was getting worried about the way the boy was clinging so hard to Harm.  It wasn’t going to make it any easier when they finally had to say goodbye.

            They chatted a little at the table but mostly concentrated on eating.  Harm insisted that Mac have something as well but it wasn’t until he reminded her that she realized they hadn’t had dinner either.  She wasn’t overly hungry, but stuffing down a dry sandwich somehow seemed easier than arguing with Harm when he was in full-blown protector mode.  His sometimes overly developed sense of responsibility for those around him was one of the things she loved most about him.

            Aaron only ate half his sandwich but he finished off the milk in record time.  Mac noticed his eyelids beginning to droop and was about to say something to Harm, but he was already on it.  Rising to his feet, he scooped the boy out of his chair.  “Come on, champ.  Let’s see if we can find you a rack for the night before you do a nosedive into your Jell-o.”

            Wrapping his arms around Harm’s neck and his legs around his middle, Aaron rested his head on the wide shoulder and was nearly asleep by the time they returned to Emergency.  After a little cajoling, Harm managed to convince the doctor to admit Aaron for the night.  They took him upstairs to the pediatric ward and got him settled down in a room with green and yellow teddy bears festooned on the walls and ceiling.

            The poor kid was so wiped he could hardly keep his eyes open but he still fussed when Harm tried to leave.  She watched from the far side of the room as the tall, dark figure bent over the smaller one in the bed.  He stroked the boy’s slightly unruly mop of dark hair and whispered something she couldn’t hear.  It had the desired effect, though.  Aaron nodded his head and Harm gave him one of those signature grins of his.

            Leaning closer, Harm ruffled the boy’s hair again then kissed his forehead.  The move surprised her a bit, but it also filled her with warmth.  She couldn’t help giving him a tender smile of her own as he finally left the bed and came over.

            “I’m not even going to tell you what I had to promise to get him to go to sleep,” he said quietly.

            She laughed softly.  “He’s a master negotiator, isn’t he?”

            “Naw, he just puts on that puppy-dog face when he’s trying to get something he wants.”

            “So do you,” she teased, pulling open the door.

            She was waiting for him to fire some kind of comeback at her but he never got the chance.  The doctor met them in the corridor, his face a mask of worry.  “The boy’s mother has taken a turn for the worse.  I’m afraid she won’t last until her parents arrive.”

            “Is she conscious?” Harm asked quickly.

            “Barely.”

            Mac could literally feel the tension coiling through his big body.  “Can I see her?”

            “I suppose so, but only for a moment,” the doctor replied.

            He led the way back down the corridor and up to the ICU ward on the floor above pediatrics.  He escorted them to the wide double doors leading into the ward.  “She’s in bed three.  Don’t stay too long.”

            “I won’t.”  Harm gave the doctor a nod as the older man started back down the hall, then turned to her.  “This is something I need to do alone.”

            “I know,” she said softly, “but I’ll be right here when you’re done.”

            A small smile touched his lips.  “Sounds like something I said to Aaron.”

            She smiled back.  “That’s because friends look out for friends.”

            He pulled her to him for a quick but tantalizing kiss.  “You’re more than just a friend, Mac.”

            Before she could respond to that, he yanked the door open and disappeared inside.

            Despite his assurances that he wouldn’t stay long, Harm didn’t return for almost fifteen minutes.  When he did, his face was a sickly gray and his eyes were filled with a haunted look that had Mac moving toward him the instant she saw him.

            “How did it go?” she asked softly.

            “She...”  He had to swallow – hard.  Mac handed him the cup of lukewarm coffee she’d gotten from the dispenser.  He tossed it down in one swallow like he wished it was something a lot stronger than coffee.  “She was pretty out of it,” he finished, his voice rough and raw.  “Seeing me only got her more confused at first but I...I helped her sort it out.  I told her about the accident and told her Aaron is okay.”

            “Are you?” Mac asked quickly.  He continued to stare at the floor, oblivious to everything around him.  She put a hand on his wrist.  “Harm?”

            His head sprang up.  “What?”

            “I asked if you’re all right, but I think I have my answer.”

            “No, I’m okay,” he said unconvincingly.  “Seeing her like that just shook me up a little is all.”

            “Uh-huh,” she muttered, always amazed at his gift for understatement.  She slid her arm through his and tried to lead him away.  “Come on, there’s nothing more we can do here tonight.”

            He shook his head.  “I’m going to stay a little longer, just until we hear...”  His voice trailed off, but the glance he threw over his shoulder toward the ICU ward finished the thought for him.

            Mac nodded.  “All right, but let’s go back to the cafeteria and find some decent coffee.”

~~~~~~

            The news they were waiting for – and dreading – came twenty minutes later.  Jennifer went into cardiac arrest and nothing the doctors tried could bring her out of it.  Harm stared into the steaming refill Mac had only recently placed in front of him but his thoughts were with Aaron.  How were they going tell that poor kid his mother was dead?  She was all he had and now she was gone.

            He couldn’t help the memories that flooded through him of the day they came to tell them about his dad.  Despite her own grief, his mother took him into her arms and held him tight.  Her reassuring presence gave him the one faint glimmer of hope that he would get through that terrible time.  Who was going to be there for Aaron?

            The answer to that was blatantly simple, but how was he supposed to explain to Mac that he intended to stay with the boy for as long as he needed him?  Tomorrow was Sunday and they’d made plans to spend it together, just relaxing and recharging their batteries for another grueling week.

            Mac slid into the chair beside him and slipped an arm across his shoulders.  It was only then that he realized she’d been talking to him.  He dragged himself out of his thoughts and turned to her, only to lose himself in the infinite sadness in her dark eyes.

            “Come on,” she whispered.  “Let’s go home.  They’re not going to tell Aaron until he wakes up tomorrow.  We’ll make sure we’re back here before then.”

            Her understanding and compassion hit him in a deeper place than he’d ever thought possible and he suddenly found himself embarrassingly close to tears.  Blinking frantically and swallowing several times, he gave a quick nod and shoved to his feet.

            As they stepped out into the cool night air, Harm glanced at his watch and realized it was already Sunday.  “It’s a lot later than I thought it was.  Why don’t I drive you straight home.  If you want to come back with me in the morning, I’ll pick you up, but if you’d rather have the day to yourself, that’s okay too.”

            She shook her head.  “Not a chance, flyboy, on either count.  My car’s at your place so that’s where I’m going and I’m definitely coming back with you in the morning.”

            The day’s events were beginning to catch up with him and he didn’t bother to argue.  He just pulled her against his side as they walked to the car.

            When they arrived at his apartment, she insisted on coming inside.  She said it was only for a moment but as soon as they got in the door, she headed for the fridge.  “You didn’t eat anything at the hospital.  Do you want something now?”

            “No, I’m not hungry,” he tried.

            “Harm, you have to eat, even if it’s only a snack.”

            Before he could protest further, she opened the fridge and started pulling out vegetables.  In short order, she presented him with a plate of cut veggies and a bottle of water.  “There, it’s only rabbit food, but I think you’re part rabbit anyway.”

            He chuckled and took the plate from her.  Carrying it to the sofa, he sat down and made an attempt to eat enough to at least erase the worry lines from her brow.  She brought over his water, along with a bottle for herself, and sat down beside him.

            His mind was going in a hundred directions at once, but Harm could also feel the fatigue beginning to pull at him.  He ate half the plateful then set it aside.  “I’m bushed, Mac, and you must be too.  Go home and get some rest.”

            As he got slowly to his feet, Mac rose as well, picking up his plate.  “All right, but I’m just going to tidy up a bit first.”

            He thought about arguing but decided it wasn’t worth it.  She started to walk away but he caught her arm and pulled her close, kissing her deeply before whispering,  “Thanks.”

            She smiled up at him.  “You’re welcome, now go get some sleep before you do a nosedive into your veggies.”

            He chuckled at her variation on the line he’d used with Aaron.  After another quick kiss, he headed up the stairs to the bedroom.

            He looked at the neatly made bed and decided he couldn’t be bothered stripping down and climbing under the covers.  Instead, he pulled off his shirt and stretched out on top of the comforter.  Despite the jumble of thoughts that were chasing themselves around in his mind, he immediately felt himself starting to drift.

            He heard Mac come into the room and felt her sit down beside him.  Her gentle fingertips brushed his forehead and he managed to peel one eye open.  Half asleep, he reached for her.  Her warm body fitted itself next to his and the last thing he remembered was her soft kiss on his cheek before he drifted off to sleep.

~~~~~~

            Harm awoke a few short hours later, Mac still in his arms.  Her head resting on his shoulder, she had one arm flung across his chest, as though trying to embrace him even in sleep.  He was still dead tired mentally, but his body had received just enough of a recharge to react swiftly and completely to the feel of her pressed so tightly against him.

            He longed to kiss her awake slowly and take all morning to finally show her just how much she meant to him, but the nagging thoughts and memories of yesterday refused to yield to the desire building within him.  They warred with each other for control over him and he finally had to clamp down on everything, burying it deep beneath a discipline forged from years of military service.

            Hoping he could extricate himself without waking her, he gradually eased out from under her and rolled off the bed, but he was only halfway to the bathroom and a much needed shower when her soft voice filled the room.  “Good morning.”

            He turned and found himself drawn back to her, sitting down and leaning over her to give her the long, slow kiss he’d want to earlier.  She responded instantly, wrapping her arms around his neck and drawing him down as she lengthened and deepened the kiss, taking it to a far more intimate level than he’d planned on.  An instant before he descended completely into the flames, she drew back, stroking his cheek with one warm palm.  “You didn’t sleep very long.”

            “Long enough,” he replied softly.

            “You’re probably eager to get back to the hospital.”  She sat up and swung her legs over the edge of the bed.  “Go grab a shower while I throw together something for breakfast.”

            He was eager to get back to the hospital, but he was also eager for something else.  She settled the argument raging within him by disappearing down the stairs.  Shaking his head, he rose and started toward the shower.

            Fifteen minutes later, he descended into the living area to find a stack of toast and a steaming cup of coffee on the table.  “Dig in,” she told him.  “If you don’t mind, I’m going to jump in the shower.”

            “Of course I don’t mind, but what about your breakfast?”

            “Already finished,” she said brightly.  She bounded up the stairs, leaving him to his toast and coffee.

~~~~~~

            They arrived at the hospital a short time later and went straight to the pediatric ward.  They were only halfway down the hall when they heard a loud, wailing cry.  Harm instantly recognized the voice.  Firing a quick look at Mac, he broke into a run.  She was right beside him and they sailed together through the door to Aaron’s room.  He was standing on the far side of the room, struggling against the hold of an older woman kneeling in front of him.  An older man stood nearby with the doctor.

            Sobbing bitterly, Aaron tried again to break free from the woman’s grasp.  He spotted Harm an instant later and with a savage yank, pulled out of her grip and flew across the room.  Instinctively, Harm dropped to his knees, catching the boy as he slammed into his chest.  Two thin arms flung around his neck, nearly strangling him.

            “They said my mommy’s dead, that she’s never coming back, but you said I could see her!”

            Harm squeezed Aaron tight, wishing he’d never made that promise.  “I know I did, champ, but she was just too sick.  She didn’t want to leave you.  She told me to tell you she loves you very much and she’s very sorry she has to leave.”

            “I don’t want her to go,” Aaron wailed.

            “Nobody does, son, but it couldn’t be helped.”  Holding him tight, Harm rose to his feet.  Aaron clung to him, sobbing so hard his small body shook.  His heart breaking for the kid, there was nothing Harm could do but hold him, pressing his face to the boy’s soft hair so that no one would see the tears he couldn’t hold back any longer.

            After what seemed an eternity, Aaron cried himself into an exhausted sleep.  Harm very reluctantly relinquished him to a waiting nurse, taking a moment to get himself squared away before turning to the others in the room.  Mac had tears in her eyes and he longed to reach for her, but the slightly hostile stares from the older couple dragged his attention away.

            He shot a quick glance toward Aaron as the nurse tucked him into bed then turned back to the others.  “Maybe we should talk outside.”

            They both nodded, following him and Mac out into the corridor.  The doctor came out as well, but with a sympathetic look, he left them alone.  As soon as he was gone, Harm turned to the couple.  “You must be Jennifer’s parents.  I’m very sorry for your loss.”

            “Thank you,” the older man replied, “but you are...?”

            “I’m Cdr. Harmon Rabb and this is Lt. Col. Sarah MacKenzie.  We’re with the US Navy JAG Corps.  I’m also an old friend of Jennifer’s.  We witnessed the accident yesterday but I didn’t realize Jen was involved until later.  I haven’t even seen her in years.”

            “Why does Aaron seem so attached to you?” the woman asked.

            That wasn’t going to be easy to explain.  “He was trapped in the car for a few minutes.  He was pretty scared and I was the first person to get to him.  I guess he’s just holding onto something familiar.”

            “Well, I suppose we should thank you, then,” Aaron’s grandfather said.  “You didn’t have to go to all the trouble of coming back this morning.”

            That was probably even harder to explain.  “I knew it was going to be tough on him, finding out his mother was gone.”

            Mac took a step forward.  “I’m sorry if this sounds indelicate but...where is Aaron’s father?”

            The older man’s expression darkened.  “I have no idea.  He and Jennifer were...no longer together when Aaron was born.  She never said much about it, but we both got the feeling he ran out the minute she told him she was pregnant.”

            Mrs. Loring’s chin jutted out slightly and her eyes narrowed in a way that bothered Harm on a deeper level than he cared to examine.  “She was young and unmarried.  We tried to convince her to give up the baby but she refused.  Now that I’ve seen him, I admit he a very handsome boy, but—”

            “Excuse me?” Harm blurted.  “You haven’t seen him until now?”

            The woman’s expression turned indignant.  “His birth caused something of a rift between us and Jennifer.  She chose to raise him in Baltimore.”

            “It’s not that far from Greensboro,” he said harshly.  Mac’s gentle hand on his arm stopped him from saying any more.

            She shot him a warning glance then turned back to the Lorings.  “Is Aaron going to be going back with you?”

            “I suppose so,” Mr. Loring sighed.  “It sounds like he doesn’t have anywhere else to go.”

            “Yes he does,” Harm replied before he could stop himself.

            Three pairs of eyes zeroed in on him.  He met each set briefly, pausing the longest on Mac’s.  “He can stay with me.”

            “Absolutely not!” Mr. Loring snorted.  “He barely knows you.”

            “And he doesn’t know you at all!”  This time he ignored Mac’s hand and her warning look.

            The older man took a step forward.  “I sincerely hope you aren’t going to make things difficult.”

            “Oh, I’m going to make them difficult all right.  If I have to, I’ll sue you for custody of Aaron.”

            Mac yanked on his arm hard this time.  “Harm!”

            He ignored her again, focusing on the couple in front of him.  “I will do it, and I’ll win.”

            “Why?” Mr. Loring sneered, “because you’re some hotshot attorney?”

            A firm resolve settled deep into Harm’s soul.  “No,” he replied, his tone cold and hard.  “I’ll win because I’m his father.”

 

This is part 1 of a 3 part story

 

Part 2

Part 3